rocb0yz:

titytwochainz:

tsunamiwavesurfing:

onkay:

tsunamiwavesurfing:

bitches ain’t even 5’5” demandin a 6’3” nigga like “pick someone your own size” ain’t a thing

Im 5’2” and my ex is 6’4” step off

your ex already did

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omg.

thugmissus:

xemkgx:

do not fall in love with people like me.
i will take you to museums, and parks, and monuments, and kiss you in every beautiful place, so that you can never go back to them without tasting me like blood in your mouth. i will destroy you in the most beautiful way possible. and when i leave you will finally understand, why storms are named after people.

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poopflow:

you put the condom on your dick
but you don’t actually do any fucking
it’s a metaphor
I can’t get laid

dendropsyche:

Oh, wait, you said ”SEND NUDES”? I thought you said “SEND NUKES” hahaha whoops uh i guess you should evacuate your city or something

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